Current Status: Sad Zombie

This is it. I leave in about 5.5 hours. I've been trying to sleep, but my excited/anxious/sad/happy/crazy mind isn't allowing me. 

I had interview #5 yesterday. It was scheduled as a Skype interview, but ended up being over the phone because the CEO couldn't get back to the office in time. It went well. Definitely different than any other interview I've been a part of, but in a good way. We had a follow up Skype this morning, just to put a face to the voice. It was a five minute thing that literally was just for him to see what I looked like. It is LA. 

The good news is I'm one of two final candidates. He will be making his final decision this weekend and will let me know the result on Monday. The best part of the whole thing, besides potentially getting the job, was what he said if I didn't get the job. If he ends up choosing the other guy/gal, he offered to put me in contact with some companies he was familiar with in the area and help me find another option. I couldn't believe how gracious he was being. I'm certain I've never heard that in any interview, but it just goes along with people in LA really just wanting to help you out. Crazy, but awesome.

So, if that ends up being my job, I'm going to be pretty excited. If it doesn't, at least I have other options and another avenue to go through for help. I still can't wrap my mind around the fact that I might actually be making this work. This time last year, you could have never convinced me I would be moving to LA. Now, I'm actually making that happen...and it's scary great. 

I've come to the realization that I have two choices for my path in life: A) stay in St. Louis, probably be unhappy for a long time and constantly wonder "what if" OR B) move to LA, be unhappy about leaving friends and family and make a new life for myself. Both options are not easy. Yesterday, I got really upset, and I kept thinking "Why am I doing something that is making me so unhappy?" But I keep reassuring myself that no matter how far away, I will still be able to talk and listen and laugh with my friends and keep up with my family. I know without a doubt, that if I don't do this now, I will forever kick myself for not at least trying. 

One of my mantras: you never know until you try. I constantly say that to myself. I am the one person who would never think to try this, and here I am. Here goes nothing...

One Big Missing Piece

After reading my last post, it's pretty obvious that I don't have a lot of my new life figured out quite yet. I'm pretty proud of the little bit I have planned out, and I know I'll be able to get by for at least a month, more if necessary, but there's one thing every twenty-something and beyond needs: a job. 

I have filled out countless applications over the last six months or so. I have them all written down for my own personal records, so I guess I could sit down and take a count. But the more important number is how many interviews I have gotten out of the many, many potential careers, and that number isn't nearly as impressive.

I recently had a revelation: I need a job that doesn't include children. Many have witnessed my distaste for little ones and yet, somehow I convinced myself that a career revolving around them was the right choice for me. A college degree and five different jobs in the educational field later, I finally gave in. No matter how I try to force it and no matter how good I was at the job (Oh, let's face it. I was great), it just wasn't going to happen for me. I had a love/hate relationship with kids that was growing heavy on the hate side. 

So before I go ruining the thought of kids ever being in my life again, I thought it might be time for a little change. That's right. Not only am I going to California with my eyes closed and my fingers crossed, but I am going to launch an entire career overhaul. It's ok, I know what you're thinking: I'm one crazy mofo. At least I'm not on drugs. 

Like I said, I have had several interviews. Some great, some not so great, as expected. One thing that I have learned through this whole process is that no one believes you're actually moving to California. Even if you have an LA address on your resume and the most solid laid travel plans, you're in question until they see you there in person. And even after that, they still think you have a side plan to become a model or actor. So while trying to jump start on a new career path, I'm also trying to prove that I don't have secret motives....all from 2,000 miles away. More hurdles, yay!

Today, I had my third Skype interview for an executive assistant position for a media company. I have had a few Skype interviews for other positions, as well. It's pretty crazy to think that I probably would have never been considered for this job without being able to interview "face to face." It's also pretty crazy that I've gone through three interviews and a get-to-know-you chat for an assistant position. At this point, though, I don't have the option to be choosy, and I'm pretty open to anything that will expand my resume beyond "Tiny Human Wrangler."

In LA, it's all about who you know and being able to let them help you. I had trouble with this, at first. I wanted to be an independent woman and stomp around in camo with Destiny's Child (Is there such a job? 'Cause I'll take it.), but the reality is, I am going to need a lot of help. So, fingers crossed on this job. The interviews seem to be going well, but if this one doesn't work out, I've got some other ideas lined up.


p.s. Is it ok for me to try to be friends with the HR girl I've been interviewing/chatting with? Even if I don't end up getting the job? :)

UPDATE: Interview #4 is scheduled for tomorrow afternoon. Oh lawd.

The Low Down

In three days, I will be embarking on the biggest adventure of my life. I am the girl who cried relentlessly on day one of church camp and secretly phoned my parents from a Steak N Shake payphone because I was so home sick. I sobbed for the first week of college and forced my sister to just sit on the phone with me for hours to console me. And approximately 84 hours from now, I will be hitting the road, headed west. 

I can't say that moving out of the St. Louis area had ever crossed my mind, ever. Growing up across the river, living in St. Louis was no big deal. I had even considered Chicago at one point in time. The Midwest is so comfortable and easy and familiar. Why would I leave?

Ok, ok, ok....four years have gone by since graduating college. I've had four different jobs in two school districts, a few serving jobs and I've been a nanny on the side for two years. I've lived at my parents' house in Illinois, in Chesterfield, in Soulard, back with my parents, back to Soulard and now back with my parents, again. Not exactly terrible, but not really where I expected my life to be on the verge of my 28th birthday. On the plus side, I don't have many bills, I don't pay rent and/or have a house payment, I have a college degree, I've been able to get jobs when I needed them, and I'm not illegitimately pregnant. My pros/cons list is pretty even steven. 

So, back to the question, why would I leave? Why now? Well, like any good romance novel, there's this boy.........blah blah blah, don't move there for a boyfriend, blah blah blah, what happens if you break up, blah blah blah, you don't know if things are going to work out. I get it. I'm trying to not become that stereotypical girl who is blinded by a relationship. I want this move to be about me and figuring out my life, first and foremost.

Short story is, we met in college, but it was never the right time for either of us to start a relationship together. We kept in contact after college and last year, realized this was something we wanted to try. Perfect timing! He lives in LA, and I live in St. Louis! I guess it's never really been ideal for us, but I realized, now is as good of a time as any to give it a go. 

So, again, WHY AM I MOVING? It all boils down to not having a lot to hold me back. I'm ready for an adventure. Ready for something to happen. I want to be able to tell everyone "When I was 28, I was crazy and picked up what little stuff I had and moved to California." I will be terribly sad to leave my friends and family behind, but Skype is here to save the day. My puppy dog will be coming out as soon as I find a place to live and until then, he'll be a master-Skyper, as well. I just know that I'll never have this opportunity ever again, so it's time to take advantage of it while I can. 

I am grateful for my life and friends and family, but it's time to shit or get off the pot. Hopefully, I won't bawl too relentlessly when I've (fingers-crossed) made it to LA and this all really hits me. And if I can't stop crying, I can always come back - the roommates said they'd hold my spot for me. 

I'm down to the bare essentials. Clothes, shoes, accessories, crock pot.....and I did some Angelina-from-Jersey-shore-packing and got out the trash bags. 

Some of the unorganized hanging clothes that will come along, too. A load of laundry and some snacks, and that's all folks! I'm a gypsy!